ATAullah's thingy

Restless is my mind, restless are my thoughts and restless are my eyes.

Restlessness is in my genes. Restlessness comes from my dad and restlessness is not bad.

My principal once wrote to me in a parchment on our farewell and she wrote , “The first thing that strikes one about you is your cheerfulness and of course your shifty restless eyes. May you continue to be cheerful all through, and yes restless too, but restless to excel. I have no doubt that you have a bright future but work for it. You were perhaps destined to be a Georgean.” Although she wrote something about each student in the class counting 12. It felt like the 2 in the 12 never existed. It was just me who existed. Felt glad about it.

Restless is my mind, restless are my thoughts and restless are my eyes.

I have so many thoughts wrestling in my mind that sometimes I do not know what to write about. Its like I want to but I cannot. It just does not happen. The same is the case with my life at large. I have so many , many, many, many, (yes I notice the many, do u notice the gravity now ?) things to do. But when I try to do them or when I take them up , it just does not happen.

Restlessness is in my genes. Restlessness comes from my dad and restlessness is not bad.

I have been to Delhi and other connecting areas in ten days and these days were like the best ten days of my life. When one says they were the best days of one's life, one is left in doubt . Unsure of what one is saying and questioning to oneself were those really one's best days ? These statements come from experience not mere presumption. I have ‘lived’ these ten days. I could die for these ten days. I have lived a life I had only dreamt of and now when I come back to Hyderabad I am what I was . Those ten days have infused and induced laziness in me. I do not know what to do. I do not know what I have to do.

I am just hoping that this restless mind of mine could get the cue from this very post of mine. I wish to be perfect , knowing fully well that I cannot be one. I wish to visit Delhi once again and ‘live’ again knowing fully well that that the moment gone will never come back. I wish to sleep, I wish to dream and I wish to wake up so that I could repeat the cycle . I wish to wake up now this very moment. I wish to take myself to a new level.

Like the cycle , I wish to repeat these lines again and again .

Restless is my mind, restless are my thoughts and restless are my eyes.

Restlessness is in my genes. Restlessness comes from my dad and restlessness is not bad.